Retro post: Baby Oh baby

[This post appeared on my old blog last year and Kelly P. has suggested it be copied over here while I'm still having Bloggers' block.]

If hell were personalized for each one of us, I've decided that mine would be a 24 x 7 string of baby showers. It's that time of my life. A few years ago I had to go through all of the marriages, and now it's the babies. And there's nothing more degrading then being the sole single person amongst your group of friends. I had a hard time bonding with any of them over how much spitup is normal for a 2 month old.

But I started out with my trip to Wal-Mart for a gift. She had registered there, so I printed off the list here at home and took it to the store. First of all, the list didn't include any pictures, and the descriptions were something like (10 pk lsr dpr pl bg). Um, yeah. Those serial codes really help too. And have you been in the baby section lately? Nothing is in a logical order. Having no kids, I assumed that it would be organized relatively easily. Bottles and bottle accessories here. Clothing there. And diapers over there. Walking down an aisle it was more like; diaper, bottle, gate, bottle, washcloth, gas-powered tree trimmer, bath tub, soap, brand x diapers... You get the point.

So finally, I settled on the bath tub and shampoo and soap accessories. All from the list. Which I found out later means nothing. Because I stuck to the list and got what she wanted, someone else went out and got the Lexus version of the baby bath and made me look like a cheapskate. Bah.

And we only played one game, which shockingly I won. Granted, I cheated with my friend next to me. But still, I got the gift, opened it, and it was a candle and votive. And then I had to decide whether that was something I was supposed to keep, or if this is one of those parties where I'm actually supposed to turn around and give it back to the mom. Friend told me that since it wasn't babyish, I was supposed to keep it, which still garnered scowls from the cheap seats.

All in all, it wasn't too terrible. I sat and "oooh-ed and awwwed" with the best of them. And I caught up with a friend I hadn't seen in years. (We were trying to decide how long it had been, and I realized that it was at least before she was pregnant. Her son is almost 3 now. Guess that solves it). And I'm having lunch with the mommie-to-be tomorrow so I hope to get all the behind the scenes details.

My mom always brings up the fact that by the time I get married, all my friends will be established and they may not remember what it's like to go through the showers for the first time. This has led me to one conclusion. When I get married, or have kids, I'm only asking for one thing. Big ass gifts. After all, isn't that the true reason we keep in contact with our childhood friends?